patience and playing

I have to get this off my chest - 14 more sleeps!!! If you are wondering what I am referring to, check out my inner workings here. And yes, the excitement continues to mount (if that is at all possible).

I want to share something else too - I love my kids. I really do. Even after trying situations, shed tears, even (alas) screaming (not from me), I love my kids to the core of their being. They are amazing, beautiful, intelligent, caring, funny, sweet, understanding, passionate, energetic...BUT...there are times when I totally lose my cool. I find that these times are on the rise as of late. I can't really tell you why. I can only tell you that Rowyn rarely saw me lose my temper when she was my only little one. Now that I have two lovely noisemakers, I feel like I am being pulled apart at the seams at times. For my friends who have 3 plus kids, I am sure you are laughing your heads off right now. I am in awe of you and how you do what you do.

A friend shared with me the other day (maybe it was yesterday, but losing track of days is a highlight of being a stay-at-home-mom and also, it was her hubbie who first shared this thought) that maybe it isn't a bad thing for kids to see that there are limitations to everything - including mommy's grace and patience. I think I agree with this. What do you guys think? In the meantime, I continue to ask for forgiveness, communicate with my girls what is happening inside my head, and go to the Master of Patience for help. :)

I also have GREAT news to share. Vi has started to sleep for 2 hours in the afternoon!! I can't believe it and hope I haven't jinxed anything by sharing this. It has been 4 days now. I can get sooooo much done in those 2 hours. Last night as I lay in bed I felt convicted that perhaps I was letting an opportunity slide, an opportunity to spend quality time with my oldest. I awoke this morning resolved to remedy the situation. Fast forward to 1 pm. I ask Ro if she would like to play and she loudly yells "yes!" We grab her doll house and accompanying paraphernalia. Ro starts to play and I join her a couple of minutes later. I dive into the imaginary play, advancing the story that is being spun. After being told "no mom" 3 times, I asked Ro if she wanted to play by herself. She tried to sound polite when she said, "Mom, leave me alone please." Deflated, I asked if I could at least read beside her while she played. Ro graciously agreed. So much for playing with my 3 year old...

Giggling to myself (because that's all I can do) as I recount today's proceedings,
Tam