What I want my kids to see.....
Jesus with skin on. What does that mean? It means loving boldly (those who wouldn't regularly experience love), giving generously (going without some wants so others can have some needs), and living in peace (amongst other things).
Who can we love boldly? And how? We can love our friends and meet needs, known and unknown. We can share meals, our time, our space, our stuff. We can put others before ourselves. We can love Jesus, and submit to Him. What does this look like to a 3 year old? Well, how do you show a friend you love them? We get to know them better by spending time with them, by learning more about what makes them happy and what they don't like, and by giving of ourselves and our things. Jesus wants us to show this kind of love to everyone, including widows and orphans.
What does this look like to us? We can invite people over, share a meal, get to know them better. We can listen to them and see where we can get our hands dirty in order to help them and show them they are loved. The girls need to see me learning more about Jesus through reading my Bible, by sharing with them. I can model submission to them, obedience, and freedom. We can spend time with one other family each weekend. The girls and I can have playdates with other moms and kids during the week, making sure no one is lonely. We will dig deeper into kidmax lessons during the week. I will spend time with Jesus everyday in front of the girls, and by myself. This may mean getting up earlier (Vi is up around 5 each morning - this might be tough) or doing it right after they go to bed (way more doable at this point).
Our time as a family is sometimes the hardest thing to share. We don't get much family time during the week, but we sometimes get 30 minutes before Ben goes to work. We could do a better job capitalizing on that time as a family, by relaxing together, praying together, loving each other unconditionally, instead of trying to get something done and worrying about what the day may hold. After all, a to do list is just another list.
A 3 year old can get their head wrapped around sharing toys (though they may not like it and may not want to do it all the time). We can start to dialogue about sharing money also. We could brainstorm different ways we could help others with the things we have (time, money). We can show Ro how we support different causes (our local church, Compassion, MCC, etc.) and ask her what she would be interested in learning more about. We could talk about sacrificing a meal out and giving that money, instead, so people can have clean drinking water. We can talk about forgoing individual gifts and having a family experience, or giving what we would have spent on gifts to another worthy organization.
Peace is something we strive for in our words and actions. Peace begins in the home and is modeled by our behaviors - proactive and reactive. We need to be ever mindful of that, regardless of how sleep deprived we are. The words we choose and the tone we use to deliver them can be used to build up or tear down. We always need to build up. No one else is going to fill this role in our children's lives. We need to show forgiveness and reconciliation. We can show what it looks like to ask forgiveness and grant it.
As a parent, I have much to ask forgiveness for - selfishness, laziness, worrying about things that don't necessarily affect my daughters' characters, being impatient and harbouring resentment in my heart, not being intentional enough about modeling love, generosity, and peace. The cool thing is that I know I am loved and forgiven by those I call my family and by Jesus. I am imperfect, but I know in my weakness, Jesus will show His strength.
Determined to run the race with joy and a thankful heart,
Tam
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