the four first days of school

I could start this entry in so many different ways.....but let's just dive in, shall we?

This September, Ro is starting Junior Kindergarten at our local public school. One thing I love about our school (already) is how they tackle graduated entry. This is why Ro has had four first days of school. Last Thursday, Ro met Mrs. McKay and got to explore her classroom for 30 minutes. Two other JK students were there also so Ro made 2 new friends. Awesome! On Tuesday, Ro attended school for 1 hour with five other JK kids. Ro went for a half day on Thursday with 6 other kids, and today was her first full length, full class day. I know this is a pain for working parents, but I think my kid has benefitted from the gradual introduction to a life-changing event. There has definitely been one downside - the pain and anguish of anticipation. Her emotions have run the gauntlet of being totally euphoric to manic to downright sad. We have had more tears in the last couple of weeks than almost all year (that might be an exaggeration).

Each day before her visits, she has had an "anxious tummy". She inherited that from her mother. This has affected her appetite for the meal she would eat before going for a visit. She has just pecked at her food, sullen, lost in thought. She has been able to voice some anxiety. On Tuesday, she wanted to know if there was a bathroom in her class. I wasn't 100% sure the answer to that question, so I told her she would need to ask Mrs. McKay. When I picked her up 1 hour later, she not only told me that there was a bathroom, but that there was only one for boys and girls, and that it had a blue door. I also found out that the water table had water, the painting centre was open, the computers still weren't working, there were 2 Connors in her class, they had morning circle on the blue carpet and today they had sung "Who stole
the cookie from the cookie jar?", and Ro had learned where to put her backpack outside so no one would trip on it while they were playing. She said she was to put it in the hole so no one would fall into it. From an adult's perspective, she was to put it in the yellow painted circle on the hard top. The circle was the hole. :) Clearly day 1 by herself was a success, albeit it was only 1 hour.

To start a school routine right off the bat, I asked Ro on Tuesday if she wanted to talk about her day on the walk home, at supper time, or some other time. I expressed how important it was for us to talk about everything and anything. I also told her I would ask who she was kind to and what she did to show kindness. Ro said she wanted to talk about school and its happenings on the way home each day. And she did (see above dialogue).

Some new things have been the cause of much excitement. Ro has been super excited about using her backpack. We gave it to her for Christmas last year, and she loves the idea of taking it to school. She managed to carry it halfway there on Tuesday (running shoes and change of clothes inside - got to be too heavy) and the whole way there on Thursday ("Mr. Zippy" and change of clothes). In fact, Ro asked me if the person who puts their backpack beside Ro's in the classroom will be her new best friend. Come on, how cute is that! The other things that have caused much excitement are the prospect of having gym, recess, and filling and carrying her lunchbag. We packed her first lunch/snack on Thursday (2 Arrowroots, cucumber slices, and apple slices) and she wanted to carry it separately to school (not in her backpack). Actually, I ended up carrying it. And we had our first case of "food envy". Ro shared that Mrs. McKay told them they were to eat their healthy foods first (Ro chose to eat her cucumber), so Ro was wondering if she could have "chewy, gummy things" to eat after the healthy items. I offered to cut up a fruit bar into small pieces, which she excitedly agreed to. Phew! :)

On Thursday when I picked her up, I had an interesting conversation with her teacher.

Mrs. McKay: "Did you know Rowyn has a thing for wanting her shoes REALLY tight? She asked me to tighten them 4 times."

Me: "Yes, we have been working on it. {Inside my head: "Wait until her glasses get dirty."}"

When we got home, we decided to practice with her "outdoor shoes" (not the boots in the above picture - we decided that they were causing too much "shoe stress"). After failing to get them tight enough (again), Ro said, "My heels are slipping!" EUREKA!!! My heels slip in all my shoes too - Stubbs narrow heel syndrome! So we went to Walmart and purchased 4 pairs of heel grips. While there, we opened 1 package and put them in her shoes and her feet don't slip anymore and she doesn't need to reef on the straps to get them tight enough. Finally, peace on the shoe front.

There are about 18 kids in Ro's class (good thing since she might turn out to be the equivalent of 3) - another thing we are thankful for. Ben was also able to be home this morning and walk her to school also. Ro was so thankful for that (as was I). As my baby who is still 3 starts a whole new adventure I am reminded of the things that are really important:

• She should know that she is loved wholly and unconditionally, all of the time.
• She should know how to laugh, act silly, be goofy and use her imagination. She should know that it is always okay to paint the sky orange and give cats 6 legs.
• She should know her own interests and be encouraged to follow them. 
• She should know that she’s wonderful, brilliant, creative, compassionate and marvelous. She should know that it’s just as worthy to spend the day outside making daisy chains, mud pies and fairy houses as it is to practice phonics. Scratch that – way more worthy.
• That being the smartest or most accomplished kid in class has never had any bearing on being the happiest. We are so caught up in trying to give our children “advantages” that we’re giving them lives as multi-tasked and stressful as ours. One of the biggest advantages we can give our children is a simple, carefree childhood.
• That our children need more of us. We have become so good at saying that we need to take care of ourselves that some of us have used it as an excuse to have the rest of the world take care of our kids. Yes, we all need undisturbed baths, time with friends, sanity breaks and an occasional life outside of parenthood. But we live in a time when parenting magazines recommend trying to commit to 10 minutes a day with each child and scheduling one Saturday a month as family day. That’s not okay! Our children don’t need Nintendos, computers, after school activities, ballet lessons, play groups and soccer practice nearly as much as they need US. They deserve to know that they’re a priority for us and that we truly love to be with them.

So here's to September, with new adventures, cooler weather, and each other.

Take the time to embrace your kid(s), tell them how much they mean to you, and spend some time together (reading is a great activity),
Tam